It was only fantasy to think that i deserved an ounce of happiness. To think, "you've been through shit, its ok to smile once in a while" But no. today, reality has dawned. I've been told the truth, been given a lie. a whore, a lying bitch. I am. I suppose. I never wanted anything to go wrong. I just wanted to smile, and be like the rest, to laugh, to play, to tease, to be.... happy. I was wrong to think I would deserve such wish. He makes me smile, he makes me want to live, to breath and laugh.... but, maybe, its not right anymore. what am i going to do? I just wanted to be with him. I can't believe i dared to smile. Dared to enjoy life, dared to be happy. Yesterday, must have been a dream. No whore like me is worth the time, and the effort. Why me? why the whore? it was only a fantasy to be happy. It was only a book, a lie, and nightmare. Now, reality has set in, and I'm no longer. To find the new me..... where to go, who to see, who to corrupt?